It’s been a while since I wrote a blog – I have been “busy” being pregnant 🙂
During my pregnancy my guides have been a bit quiet and I understand the baby sees what I see and there is a level of protection around us when it comes to woowoo work because he is sensitive. I will add some blogs regarding my reiki classes and experiences; however, for now, I want to tell the story of Sunday night.
Sunday, June 1st 2004, a day like any other. I open Facebook and I see a post from one of my best friends. She happens to be in the Ukraine with her son fulfilling a visa requirement and 10 walking minutes from her apartment complex there is a full on WAR going on. She woke up at 4 am hearing gunshots that seem “outside of her window” and they were living in pure fear. The posts on Facebook made me reach out to her and after we talked I decided to run reiki for the war, for all sides involved, for us…the human race and for conflict resolution. I targeted my friend, her family, her area and Ukraine in general and although I know the “proper way” to do it is to initiate the long distance symbol, etc I never felt I really “needed it” so I simply spent 5 minutes sending reiki to this bubble I had put them in and I “supercharged it” – by this I mean I always knew there was another “gear” I just imagined the maximum amount of energy going out of my hands and just sent it out with the message “run until no longer needed” – once that was done, I felt great and out of sight out of mind…I went about my day.
When I went to bed that night, the minute I closed my eyes I had a vision of being in a room with a yogi, a lady sitting with her legs crossed, hair covered kundalini style…I will call her Guru for identification purposes. I knew I had to run reiki, it felt like I was getting a message from her, the universe…so I did. I didn’t know if I was running it for her but I just ran it anyway and when I looked up, we locked eyes and she had the most intense stare and looked right in my soul…she felt strong, confident and very powerful…if that makes sense 🙂 It was as if she was present to something I wasn’t…she knew something I didn’t know, correction: something I wasn’t aware of at the moment.
The next second I felt her energy start flowing like she was running reiki back “at” me. It felt strong and intense and I was confused as to why I was called to run reiki and then she was running it back? It made no sense so I resisted it – I pushed back in a way with mine and then it got even more intense and when it did I started doubting this “activity” and myself and what I was doing. Doubt led to fear and fear led to the loudest and most scary sound plus shaking in my body like I was in the middle of an earthquake/hurricane that was threatening my physical body so I freaked out and opened my eyes quickly and “snapped out of it” – I was left scared and confused. I didn’t know what this was all about so I started seeking help.
Session #1 – dowsing with my dowsing master
Of course two weeks prior I scheduled a session with my dowsing master for no reason – it happened to be the morning after this experience, how convenient 😉
I went in a bit apprehensive, I didn’t know if I got in an energy “war” with this woman or what this was all about. She told me off the bat that the experience I had was because of me running reiki for the Ukrainian war..I had tapped into sticky business and my vision is a result of my reiki session.
We started looking into it and the first thing that came up was that this was a LESSON for me. A lesson involving trust – trust in my ability as a healer, trust in that nothing can really happen to me, trust that all is exactly the way it is supposed to be, etc. I didn’t really start feeling “bad” in my physical body until I lost fait and started getting scared – so we worked on releasing trust issues and we found various “points of access” and with the divine help cleared that for me.
We then looked at the issue of control which came up next and it came up at that I was holding on to control 100% – meaning not willing to let go, wanting to control anything and everything – well, if you know me that is no news hahaha. I tend to be on top of things (when not pregnant!) and I am controlling – it is something I struggled with all of my life and something I have been actively working on during the past few years. I don’t want to say that I can’t help it because that’s part of being a victim and that’s the third thing I’ll touch on BUT it is how I operated. So when it came up I knew YEP, it is time. We needed to release it completely…the reason it came up was because in my vision I was trying to control the energy…I felt something foreign to me and when I couldn’t control it I freaked out. SO…we found a point of access, dove in, and with the help of the divine we cleared the control issues for myself and although patterns and memories will still come up, it’ll be much easier to notice and relax in the moment.
The third thing that came up for clearing was feeling like a victim – I felt powerless when the body felt the sensations and I was very afraid…felt like something was happening “to me.” I had to be reminded that we don’t have any experiences without our prior consent and that on a higher level I chose this for myself. It is sometimes hard to realize that – I did, really? 🙂 Yes, I chose this experience and it is part of my journey. I know I am not a victim…I sort of know 😉 So, we found a point of access (16 weeks gestation actually) and we dove in and cleared any and all victim related issues I was carrying from the mother lineage, it felt really good and powerful.
We then went back to the war issue – this is not the first time I work on clearing war “drama” as I have experienced clearing things associated with the Romanian revolution, the Vietnam war, etc and I am told helping with war is something I took on for myself in this life as a healer. I find it easy and liberating but most importantly necessary. As I was thinking about this lady…and as we were doing the above clearings I kept seeing this man in a white suit, head covered with holes for eyes….sort of like a scientist working with something highly toxic. So I mention it and Erina dowses it and he is related to the war going on now and he is working on bio-chemical weapons in the Russian-Ukranian region so we’re called by his higher self to do a clearing for him, whoever he is. So we do and conflict issues come up for him since year 1010 so Erina had the guides handle that and clear it. I then saw a woman silhouette and she dowsed that that was my friend from the Ukraine and upon dowsing it came up that she (on a higher level) positioned herself there to allow for healing energy to flow through her right at the heart of the conflict…we also made sure her physical body will not be affected at all, etc.
As she is doing that, I now see a purple whale so I tell her – she thinks “oh, maybe the whale will help take the peace messages all over the world” as they are very much in tune with us and with what the planet is going through. As we work on other clearings, I then see a pyramid, crystal, tip down so I tell her about it and she tells me it is connected with release of control…well, good…since we’re working on it 😉
Next I start seeing two diamond pyramids and as I pay attention to them there is a “normal” one and an upside down one on top of each other and they almost tough at the tip but the upper one is off a bit so I move it in my mind’s eye to align it (seemed like the right thing do do?) and as I do, a light shines out of the tips like a cool BOOM I am here and cool kind of sunshine light “explosion” in a good way. Then, some geometric forms start surrounding the tips of the pyramid and creating shapes – first an outline, something with many “sides” and as I pay attention to it it looks like it is forming the flower of life. I started laughing as I am not sure what I am seeing and why but I mention it and try to describe it. She asked me if I know what it was…ern, NOPE 🙂 She then told me it is merkaba and I seem to have activated mine when I aligned my pyramids after the clearings we just did. Again, I am lost…I had to read up on it, I remember reading about it before but a long time ago – you can find info on it here http://www.openheartmasters.org/merkaba.html … I wasn’t trying to do anything but it does seem like most things I do just seem “logical” and I go along with it to then find out what it means…jump, right?
I found this too: http://books.google.com/books?id=efntA77RtJwC&pg=PA194&lpg=PA194&dq=whales+pyramid+planet&source=bl&ots=HFnLAkgREt&sig=0jERQP-xACvvdrMB0dw_RwHMawE&hl=en&sa=X&ei=Xb6PU8u9HZKpyAT7lYH4BA&ved=0CDkQ6AEwAw#v=onepage&q=whales%20pyramid%20planet&f=false It talks about whales, pyramids, merkabah, etc. There is a lot more on the internet about this that I plan to read on.
Year 1 also came up with up in a clearing and Jesus energy was present for helping which I am not surprised about as I have felt very close to “him” recently so we worked a bit on clearing conflict again, killings of infants, etc…the wounded male energy in general.
there is so much that went on with these sessions, I need to listed to my recording but for now, this is what I remember 🙂
Session #2 – I called my trusted medium for a quickie
I told her the story of the lady with the energy exchange and as she tuned in she told me that the lady in my vision was, indeed, a yogi and energy healer (past tense) and that she is now a guide who I was channeling and who will be with me many times to do reiki for war related issues, etc. She did agree that I chose to work with this particular type of healing among others and said that the intense experience I had was the guide’s energy but that instead of letting it FLOW through me and to the “affected area” I was opposing it in a way and I kept it inside and didn’t let it pass through me…apparently if I don’t become a channel and let it flow when she sends it then my body will have that intense experience that I didn’t like 🙂
She then said it is ok to call her Guru but she did provide another name (long, starts with a B and my medium didn’t get it). She showed the medium what she wants me to channel the energy she sends through my hands, all of my palm and fingers and she said all I have to do is think of where it’ll go just like I do normally and put my hands up and let it flow. Easy enough, right? 🙂
The medium also said that I can connect to the Guru in meditation and try channeling the energy again. Sounds kind of cool 🙂 I know this sounds a bit crazy but it is what I chose to do and it feels right. I do feel like there is a lot I can do and I trust that all I have to do is put my intention on it.
Reiki: I kept feeling there is “another gear” and even though the reiki class instructed us to use a “long distance symbol”, etc, etc I don’t…I just go with my gut and send the energy the way it feels natural. That’s what I did with the war in the Ukraine and since I had this experience later that day I’d say that it worked even if I didn’t do it “by the books” – it is nice to be reassured and it is also nice to experience different things and keep learning and exploring.
I am very excited to know I have a new “entourage member” and I look forward to working with her again on whatever comes up.
The two sessions really help shine light on the big picture and sometimes it does take multiple perspectives to get the whole picture and really understand whats going on. I was terrified Sunday night after I lost control of my body and it is so reassuring to know that I am 100% in charge and that I can actually help my experience and use it for a higher purpose. I wasn’t “warned” of this experience so I didn’t know what I was supposed to do and I clearly resisted it instead of channeling it. I didn’t even make the connection between my vision and the reiki I did for the war until after…I had a feeling they were connected but that was about it.
For now, that’s where I am at – pretty crazy, ei? 🙂